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A rescue fantasy is the hope that someone will sav

A rescue fantasy is the hope that someone will save you from your circumstances. It is an unconscious reaction to a feeling of vulnerability and resistance to doing the inner work post-narcissistic abuse.

The problem with rescue fantasies is that they come from a place of desperation, not from a place of solidness and wholeness.

As a result, indulging in a rescue fantasy will inevitably lead to disaster.

Follow these steps to strengthen your inner self:

1. Recognise the vulnerability within.
2. Don’t date until it is safe to.
3. Realise it takes time to assess someone’s true colours.
4. Work on core wounds and building self-worth.

Indulging in a rescue fantasy is a coping mechanism to abuse and trauma to escape the now moment.

It is evidence that the subconscious mind still drives our decisions and behaviour until we become more consciously aware of why we choose as we do.

When you come from a place of needing to fill a void, you will only meet someone who reflects the emptiness within.

Next time you indulge in a rescue fantasy, pause and become aware that your vulnerability is causing you to seek external comfort.

Once you take the time out to not date until it is safe to, you will approach dating from a place of awareness, boundaries, and recognising healthy individuals who add to your current state of being.

At beyondtheillusion.co, awaken your inner warrior to become a conscious, whole, and powerful version of yourself. Discover the wisdom, truth, and inner power that will elevate your spirit and give you peace of mind.

#narcissisticabuserecovery #narcissismrecovery #narchealing #healingafterabuse #consciousdating #healingfromnarcissisticabuse #healingfromabuse #healthydating #lifeafternarcissisticabuse #healingfromwithin

Absolutely 🔥

Self-worth is a critical topic when it comes to na

Self-worth is a critical topic when it comes to narcissistic abuse and is something all survivors struggle with.

It isn’t just a piece of narcissistic abuse recovery. It is the key to the whole process. Viewing life through a lens of worthiness can change your world.

When you engage with narcissists, toxic characters, and other types of abusers, it all comes down to a lack of self-respect and self-worth.

Moreover, much of dating advice caters to a lack of self-worth. It encourages women to appease men and play games to seem desirable instead of being ourselves and finding healthy, solid, and mature people who respect us for who we are.

So, how does one build self-worth?

Here are some steps:

1. Dive deep into introspective work.
2. Cut ties with abusers and their negativity.
3. Embrace the belief that your thoughts shape your reality.
4. Communicate with your subconscious through consistent, positive actions.

When you don’t have self-worth, you view yourself and life through a faulty lens, and your actions reflect that.

You can tell yourself you love yourself, but if you don't truly feel it, it will never have any weight behind it.

Consistent action over time builds up a true sense of self-worth by consistently taking the action that tells your subconscious mind you are worthy.

Building self-worth is one of the trickiest parts of narcissistic abuse - but if you keep examining yourself, your life, and the world, you will progress.

Need guidance on this journey towards self-worth? Narcissistic abuse counselling can provide the support you need. Click the link in the bio to book your free consultation today.

#narcissisticabuserecovery #recoveryfromabuse #abuserecovery #healingfromnarcissisticabuse #healingfromnarcissist #selfworth #healingfromnarcissism #narchealing #narcissisticabusesupport #abuserecoverysupport

Triangulation intends to create and exploit feelin

Triangulation intends to create and exploit feelings of insecurity.

Triangulation can be subtle yet damaging. This manipulation tactic plays on natural insecurities and manufactures new ones.

The manipulation can take many forms. However, it is commonly about comparing you to someone else overtly or covertly.

Here are some signs of triangulation:

1. Comparisons to ex-partners in a favourable or unfavourable light.
2. Feeling excluded by the narcissist.
3. Feelings of inadequacy.
4. Using objects to ignore and devalue you - phone, computer, pet.

Over time, these subtle manipulations erode your self-esteem and self-worth. The narcissist has complete control over your thoughts and feelings.

Through intermittent idealisation and then devaluation through triangulation, the narcissist controls how you feel about yourself.

The abuse cycle and triangulation can have lasting effects on your sense of self and identity. They effectively erase you and make you feel like something is inherently wrong with you.

They use others to devalue you - whether an ex-partner, friends and family, colleagues, neighbours, or people out in public such as staff.

The way to recover from triangulation is to gain control over your sense of reality and recognise it as nothing more than it is - a manipulation.

If you suffer from the effects of triangulation, you can gain control over your sense of self. At beyondtheillusion.co, unlock the wisdom, truth, and inner power to free yourself from abuse.

#triangulation #abusiverelationships #toxicrelationships #hiddenabuse #narcissisticandemotionalabuse #narcissisticabuse #knowthesigns #emotionalabuse #narcissistredflag #psychologicalabuse #narcissist #abusecycle #cycleofabuse

If you’ve ever wondered why narcissists have so

If you’ve ever wondered why narcissists have so much power over you, it is due to a power imbalance playing out between you.

A power imbalance holds the narcissistic dynamic together.

This power balance is not conscious - but rather a subliminal energetic dance playing out from your subconscious mind and manifests into reality.

It is not that narcissists are all powerful and knowing. They aren’t. But they know how to manipulate and have a sixth sense for detecting vulnerabilities.

So, how can you tip the scales back in your favour?

1. Recognise their manipulations.
2. Step away from the psychological tango.
3. Heal your core wounds.
4. Shift your self-perception.

These actions will liberate you from the narcissistic grip and unleash your inner strength and self-awareness.

If you are rolling around in the dumps from a narcissist, you must embark on the transformative process of connecting with your inner being.

When you know who you are, you will see narcissists for who they are. Nothing more than a person without power.

Together, let's navigate the blueprint for healing, bringing clarity, internal tranquility, and renewed hope and purpose to your life. For more on this transformative journey, click the link in my bio.

#narcissists #narcissistic #narcissisticabuseawareness #narcissisticandemotionalabuse #narcissismawareness #hiddenabuse #narcissisticabuserecovery #narcissist #narcissismsurvivor #npdsurvivor #survivingabuse #freedomfromabuse

Narcissist friends are sly because they use flatte

Narcissist friends are sly because they use flattery as a means of control. It is their way of love bombing in the context of a friendship and getting their target under control.

A friendship with a narcissist will move quite quickly, just like a romantic relationship with a narcissist does. It is because this is how narcissists operate across the board.

There will be that familiar “soulmate” feeling, where you click with this person so well and just hit it off. The narcissist friend will come on strong as your best buddy. It will happen so fast that you won’t even get to slow down to get to know them.

They use flattery as a weapon of control, pumping you up as this amazing person they get along with fantastically and love hanging out with.

They will compliment you, like all your social media photos, and rapidly become a part of your inner circle.

By coming on strong and securing you as one of their best pals, they can make you a source of narcissistic supply before they start devaluing you and icing you out.

By conditioning you through flattery as a means of love bombing, it is easier for them to control you. As they begin devaluing you, you will feel confused, unbalanced, and unable to stand up for yourself.

Through lack of awareness, vulnerabilities, and no boundary function, the narcissist friend controls and manipulates with great ease. However, when we become aware of their antics and strengthen our inner selves, the narcissist friend becomes powerless.

Be careful about who you let into your life, and don’t consider anyone part of your inner circle until they have proved themselves worthy. It takes time to get to know someone’s true character and the same goes for friendships.

People can appear entirely different on the surface from who they are. Remember, the narcissist friend is an ultimate wolf in sheep’s clothing. Read more on the blog at beyondtheillusion.co

#narcissisticabuse #narcissismawareness #narcissisticabuseawareness #narcissistfriend #narcissistfriends #narcissisticfriends #narcissist #narcissism #narcissisticsupply #lovebombing #narcissistawareness #narcissistic #narcissisticfriendships

Following your intuition will lead you towards you

Following your intuition will lead you towards your most aligned life.

#narcissisticabuserecovery #narcabuserecovery #narcissisticabuse #intuition #followyourintuition #toxicrelationships #healingfromnarcissisticabuse #healingfromabuse #abuserecovery

Toxic shame is one of the hallmarks of narcissisti

Toxic shame is one of the hallmarks of narcissistic abuse. It is a pervasive feeling of worthlessness and self-loathing.

Narcissists induce their victims into this state through the process of devaluation. However, toxic shame is not yours to carry. This deeply rooted feeling of worthlessness is not your reality but a false narrative crafted by an abuser.

Toxic shame can be transformed into self-awareness and self-compassion so that the abuser no longer affects how you view yourself.

Awareness and self-compassion are the antidotes to toxic shame.

But how do you get rid of toxic shame?

1. Detach from their story and reclaim your power.
2. Begin with altering your perception of reality.
3. Retrain negative thought patterns.
4. Evaluate your fears and beliefs.

Reversing toxic shame is a challenging journey, but with dedication, patience, and support, you can turn that pain into self-acceptance and understanding.

The ultimate liberation from abuse is to detach entirely from the abuser’s inner turmoil.

It is a lack of awareness and self-compassion that perpetuates toxic shame. But feeling trapped and hopeless is not a life sentence to this distorted reality.

Remember, toxic shame thrives in the dark. Through self-awareness and compassion, you can transform it into a sense of inner peace. I’m here to support you on this healing journey. Get in touch to explore how we can work together.

#toxicshame #toxicshamefree #narcissisticabuserecovery #narcabuserecovery #cptsdsupport #healingafterabuse #freefromabuse #healingfromabuse #narcissismfree #complexptsdawareness #complexptsdrecovery

When you meet someone new, there is a way to deter

When you meet someone new, there is a way to determine whether this person is right or wrong for you.

Meeting someone new will evoke feelings of déjà vu or safety.

When you meet someone new who is just another narcissist or perhaps not up to scratch with the quality you are looking for in a person, it feels like energy you’ve had before.

However, when you meet someone right, they will exude a fresh new energy, and the feeling is a sense of safety.

So, how can you tell the difference?

1. Trust your gut.
2. Keep a check on your emotions.
3. Evaluate - does their presence calm you or excite you?
4. Remember - safety feels different from déjà vu.

Determining if someone is a repeat of the past or something new is simple. But here’s the catch - it requires tuning in to assess this feeling.

Upon meeting someone new, one can get swept up in the excitement and ignore the feeling of déjà vu warning you it’s a repeat.

Yet when we slow down, tune in, and are honest about our feelings, we can determine the truth about a situation.

The key to navigating dating all lies within intuition. Our bodies are intelligent and can pick up on energy we might not understand yet.

We possess these powerful abilities, but people will ignore them because they don’t believe it is true. People doubt themselves and get carried away with excitement upon meeting someone new.

At beyondtheillusion.co, I empower you to reclaim control of your life through intuitive counselling sessions. Navigate through life's complexities and recover from narcissistic abuse with the power of conscious awareness.

#narcissisticabuse #datingafterabuse #datingafternarcissisticabuse #consciousdating #trustyourintuition #healthydating #consciousdatingtips #lifeafternarc #lifeafternarcissist #lifeafterabuse #lifeafternarcissism

Love bombing is a substitute for internal validati

Love bombing is a substitute for internal validation, and the way to find internal validation is by disconnecting from external sources.

#lovebombing #lovebombingisnotlove #internalvalidation

The trauma of narcissistic abuse is a harrowing ex

The trauma of narcissistic abuse is a harrowing experience, a dark night of the soul and the healing of your deepest wounds. However, it is also magnificent in the lessons and wisdom it presents to us.

With this wisdom comes an invaluable gift - discernment. It is your shield in a world filled with tricksters and deceitful situations. Narcissistic abuse is a life-altering experience that gifts us with discernment.

Discernment isn't just a skill. It's your inner compass, guiding you towards truth and safety and away from liars and deceivers. It's your armour against narcissists, toxic situations, and scams.

Lack of discernment is a vulnerability that deceivers exploit. By strengthening your discernment, you also empower your intuition.

But how do you strengthen discernment?

1. Understand that trust must be earned.
2. Question everything.
3. Remember that actions speak louder than words.
4. Guard your heart and soul.

Developing discernment is also about closing the gap of vulnerability, which leads you open to all kinds of manipulation.

Strengthen the skills of intuition and discernment and begin setting those necessary boundaries, and you will become unstoppable.

Discernment is an invaluable skill as we navigate interpersonal and collective upheaval. Keep yourself grounded in truth, resilience, and integrity.

See beyond the illusion with intuitive counselling sessions leading you to conscious awareness. Embark on this soul-recovery process today and feel empowered to move forward in these extraordinary times.

#narcissisticabuse #lifeafternarcissist #lifeafternarc #lifeafternarcissism #discernment #discernmentiskey #abusehealing #recoveryafterabuse #narchealing #posttraumaticgrowth #narcfreelife #narcissismfree #freedomfromabuse

The greatest threat to a narcissist is your self-a

The greatest threat to a narcissist is your self-awareness and growth. They thrive on creating a sense of vulnerability, counting on your limited consciousness.

It's an undeniable truth that manipulators always return for more. But remember, your self-growth and awareness are your best defence.

It is amazing how once we remember who we are and open to consciousness, we see how powerless narcissists are.

Ready to turn the tables? Here's how:

1. Use that block button when they try to infiltrate your life.
2. Notice how your actions may be perpetuating this harmful cycle.
3. Set boundaries and employ coping strategies when forced to interact.
4. Stay conscious; their tricks only work if you're a willing participant.

When you transform internally, your exterior reality shifts too. By tending to your internal wounds, you rob them of their power.

Their only power was their ability to manipulate you by playing on your lack of internal validation, boundaries, and deep unconsciousness that keeps you engaging in the dynamic.

You are in control of your life, nobody else. It is up to you to embark on the path of self-growth and self-awareness to break the cycle of abuse.

Narcissism is just a reflection of your subconscious. Shatter the illusion by harnessing your consciousness, tapping into your inner strength, and remembering who you are.

At beyondtheillusion.co, I help you unlock the wisdom, truth, and inner power within you through conscious awareness. Follow for a source of continuous inspiration.

#healingafterabuse #abuserecovery #narcissist #narcissismfree #narcfree #narcfreelife #healingfromabuse #abusecycle #cycleofabuse #innerstrength #selfawareness #boundaries #narcissistfreenow

One of my sayings is that love bombing is a substi

One of my sayings is that love bombing is a substitute for internal validation; I believe this to be true and at the very core of the dynamic between a narcissist.

Through the gradual process of becoming conscious, you become aware of why this dynamic plays out as it does, and you can then make conscious choices that disconnect from the emotional attachment to narcissists.

Love bombing is an over-the-top, grandiose, intense gesture not grounded in reality. To desire this source of comfort and validation from someone outside of yourself can only mean it is lacking within. Find internal validation within, and you will no longer desire love bombing from a narcissist.

But how can you kick this unhealthy habit?

1. Recognise you're hooked on something that's hurting you.
2. Make a firm, no-contact commitment to detox from the peptide addiction.
3. Mourn the loss of what isn't and see beyond the narcissist's illusion.
4. Realise there are healthy, sustainable relationships for you if you do the inner work.

It is not to say that the realisation that love bombing is not real – is not a painful process. I have said before that one of the most challenging aspects of recovering from narcissistic abuse is acknowledging the extent of deceit.

Recovery is not just about getting over it and moving on; it's about going deep within to find what makes you susceptible to love bombing.

Love bombing is like junk food, appealing but not nourishing. Feed your emotional health with genuine relationships and break free from this false notion of love.

Your commitment to consciousness is your first step toward healing. Unlock the power of conscious awareness with Beyond the Illusion. Read more on the blog at beyondtheillusion.co

#lovebombing #lovebombingisnotlove #narcissistawareness #narcissism #narcissist #abusiverelationship #abuserecovery #hiddenabuse #domesticabuseawareness #healingafterabuse

Recovering our soul is the fundamental aspect of h

Recovering our soul is the fundamental aspect of healing from narcissistic abuse. Achieving soul recovery involves resolving fragmentation and realigning oneself.

Soul recovery involves claiming the truth and gaining the inner power that will disentangle you from the shackles of past pain.

The quickest path to ultimate alignment is by following your intuition. Instead of being stuck in turmoil, intuition allows you to connect with your true essence. Following your intuition also connects you with a higher power or source, leading you toward harmony and enlightenment.

After the soul-destroying experience of narcissistic abuse, recovering your soul is the utmost priority.

Here are a few steps to recover your soul:

1. Make a firm commitment that you are on a mission to save your soul.
2. Follow your intuition and eliminate all negative influences in your life.
3. Work on the wounds that the narcissist honed in on and heal them.
4. Connect with the beauty of life again; find activities that uplift your spirit.

Narcissists induce a debilitating fear and self-doubt through devaluation, which confines you to the abuser’s distorted reality.

Narcissistic abuse is a severe trauma that can only be healed by reconnecting with the source. Reclaim your sanity and independence by freeing yourself from Wetiko's consciousness and reconnecting with the source.

The courageous process of soul recovery that goes along with healing from narcissistic abuse can be accomplished through conscious awareness.

Disconnecting from the distorted consciousness of narcissism and reclaiming your soul is the most liberating thing you will ever do.

As we journey through these extraordinary times, my mission is to provide wisdom and guidance, empowering you to see beyond the illusion of narcissism and embark on your path to soul recovery.

Let's reclaim control over your mind and soul together. DM me to schedule an intuitive counselling session today.

#abuserecovery #recoveryafterabuse #narcabuserecovery #abusetrauma #emotionalabuserecovery #healingfromabuse #narcissistfree #healingafterabuse #narcopathfree #healingfromnarcissist #healingfromnarcissisticabuse

Late night Xmas gin and a cold 🥶 but lovely day

Late night Xmas gin and a cold 🥶 but lovely day. Merry Christmas 🎄🎅 and a Happy New Year 💥🥳

Love, Beyond the illusion xx

The secret to beating a smear campaign lies in los

The secret to beating a smear campaign lies in losing the fear.

The only way to handle a smear campaign is not to engage and remove yourself from the situation entirely, where possible. If you give it enough time, the narcissist will burn more bridges and be exposed anyway, but when you find peace within yourself, you won’t even care.

Even if they don’t – you will not be the last person they smear, and they will continue to do it for the rest of their lives.

What matters is finding peace within yourself. Their actions reflect on them, not you.

At the core of worrying about smear campaigns, I believe, is fearing what other people think of you.

There is this need to control people’s perception of us when it happens, and rightly so because narcissists accuse you of what they are. But trying to control people’s perception only leads to a lack of control, and if people believe the narcissist, they aren’t true allies.

So, how do you let go of the fear of what people think?

1. Understand that letting go comes with growth.
2. Embrace your fear; let it wash over you.
3. Evaluate your fears; are they reality or obstacles in your mind?
4. Know who you are.

Knowing who you are is your greatest weapon against narcissists. This knowing who you are prevents you from being manipulated and terrorised by outside forces.

Narcissists will use your subconscious fears against you, keeping you locked into a lower state of consciousness.

So instead - you should choose to grow and develop a greater self-awareness because nothing will bother them more than this.

Absorbing the narcissist’s pain is a heavy weight burden. Keep detaching and letting go of the fear of other people’s opinions, and you will learn the true meaning of freedom. You will feel featherlight as you lose the weight of it all.

When you speak the truth, block the narcissist, restart your life over, and let go of taking things so personally, you let go of the fear of judgement. Need guidance through this journey? Click the link in my bio to find support.

#smearcampaign #smearcampaigns #narcissisticabuserecovery #narcabuserecovery #narcissist #narcissists #narcissistawareness #narcissism

The subconscious mind governs 95% of our actions,

The subconscious mind governs 95% of our actions, contributing significantly to our involvement in toxic and abusive situations.

Our behaviour comes from deeply rooted programs embedded in our subconscious mind operating outside our conscious awareness.

It explains how we can believe we have moved on from narcissistic individuals, only to find ourselves going on a date with another or entering into another abusive relationship. Despite our intentions to get it right this time, we feel irresistibly drawn to these individuals and struggle to leave, even when warning signs become evident.

The key lies in reprogramming our subconscious mind at its core. However, this process is neither quick nor easy, contrary to what we may convince ourselves.

So, what can you do to rewire subconscious programming?

1. Begin the process of detaching from painful and abusive experiences; realise your responsibility in walking away.
2. Find internal validation by disconnecting from external sources so the world doesn't reflect your inner subconscious wounds.
3. Recognise destructive patterns and people quicker than you would; pull yourself out before you’re too deep.
4. Do the deep inner work - don’t look for quick fixes and indulge in rescue fantasies.

It requires thoroughly examining and healing our deepest wounds and transforming our deeply ingrained beliefs and self-perceptions regarding love.

Once we successfully rewire our subconscious programming to embrace healthy dynamics, we naturally attract such experiences. The reason is that the subconscious mind operates as a magnet, drawing in experiences that align with its newly formed patterns.

The universe acts as a reflection of our subconscious mind, and through these challenging experiences, we can finally awaken and achieve full consciousness.

Are you ready to embark on a transformative journey towards healing and self-awareness? Dive into the blueprint of this conscious process.

For more information on getting in-depth support with your narcissistic abuse recovery, visit the link in the bio.

#narcissisticabuserecovery #narcrecovery #healingafterabuse #narchealing #narcissismrecovery #narcfree #healthydating

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