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The Lie You’re Telling Yourself About No Contact and How to Break Free
Narcissistic Abuse

The Lie You’re Telling Yourself About No Contact and How to Break Free

January 29, 2023July 29, 2024

When an addict finally gets clean and commits to sobriety, they don’t usually look back and wish they were drunk or high again and living…

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The Goal of Narcissistic Abuse Recovery: Closing the Gap of Vulnerability
Narcissistic Abuse

The Goal of Narcissistic Abuse Recovery: Closing the Gap of Vulnerability

January 13, 2023July 29, 2024

The goal of narcissistic abuse recovery is to close the gap of vulnerability. When there is a vulnerability, it leaves you open to all kinds…

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The Narcissist Friend is Harder to Spot
Narcissistic Abuse

The Narcissist Friend is Harder to Spot

December 23, 2022July 29, 2024

The narcissist friend is harder to spot. It is possible to be friends with a narcissist for years and not even realise it. Having been…

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Understanding the Healing Plateau and How to Overcome It
Narcissistic Abuse

Understanding the Healing Plateau and How to Overcome It

September 29, 2022July 29, 2024

If you’ve hit a plateau in your narcissistic abuse healing process, you are not the only one.  It happens to many people and is something…

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The Revolution of Perception: How Mindfulness is Reshaping Our Worldview
Covid-19

The Revolution of Perception: How Mindfulness is Reshaping Our Worldview

September 24, 2022June 16, 2023

We are in historical times when humanity is going through a profound transformational process. There has never been a better opportunity for freedom from the…

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How to Increase Your Awareness and Connect With Your Inner Guidance
Narcissistic Abuse

How to Increase Your Awareness and Connect With Your Inner Guidance

September 1, 2022June 16, 2023

Listening to your intuition bypasses the logical mind that tries to rationalise everything and is where you tune into your God-given internal guidance system. Learning…

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The Dark Night of the Soul.
Narcissistic Abuse

The Dark Night of the Soul.

July 12, 2022April 17, 2023

Narcissistic abuse is a dark night of the soul. The dark night is a spiritual crisis in the journey toward union with God. There is…

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The Power of Healing from Narcissistic Abuse: Addressing the Root Cause
Narcissistic Abuse

The Power of Healing from Narcissistic Abuse: Addressing the Root Cause

June 13, 2022July 29, 2024

The entire experience of narcissistic abuse is about the core wounding of the most painful kind. These wounds reside in the unconscious from childhood and…

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Breaking Free: How Healing the Collective Soul Can Lead to Liberation from Totalitarianism
Covid-19

Breaking Free: How Healing the Collective Soul Can Lead to Liberation from Totalitarianism

June 13, 2022June 16, 2023

According to Professor Mattias Desmet, the characteristics of mass formation are: As ruthless as it seems, there is a logical and also fascinating psychological explanation…

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The Psychology of Mass Formation: How It Affects Our Behaviour as a Group
Covid-19

The Psychology of Mass Formation: How It Affects Our Behaviour as a Group

April 14, 2022June 16, 2023

Mass formation is how we got here. It’s when a society is disconnected and has free-floating anxiety over some time. People then become hypnotised by…

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Explore my writings, offering insights and guidance on the nuances of narcissistic abuse and the path to recovery. I write about narcissism, conscious awareness, and healing on the blog.

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An abusive system is any group within society that An abusive system is any group within society that operates through a pattern of abuse. It can be within a family, workplace, school, or social group. The abusive system uses manipulation and scapegoating as their form of abuse against individuals who contrast the core values and dynamics of the abusive system. These individuals are known as scapegoats who become targeted through isolation and projection of the group’s shadow and dysfunction. Scapegoats act as mirrors in an abusive system, reflecting the group’s unpleasant and undesirable traits. They embody traits the group fundamentally lacks — empathy, warmth, authenticity, kindness, and intuitive awareness. These qualities not only set them apart, but threaten the system’s illusion of control. The abusive system views these traits as a threat to the group’s dysfunction, and instead of recognising its systemic toxicity, they attempt to annihilate and destroy the target. The abusers engage in mobbing, emotional abuse, and narcissistic abuse to slowly devalue, dehumanise and destroy the target’s sense of self. In these environments, smearing and hoovering often occur when the scapegoat starts to break free. It’s a way to discredit the scapegoat, maintain control, and undermine their self-agency. Narcissistic systems hate being exposed, so they try to reassert control when scapegoats see through the illusion. Scapegoats are those who won’t conform to the group’s hierarchy and unspoken rules, making them threats to the system’s fragile structure. The scapegoat’s role is not to absorb and internalise the toxicity of the group but rather to realise its inherent dysfunction and the deeper abusive dynamics at play. It’s about being too real, aware, authentic. Too sensitive, too intuitive. Able to see through the distortion of the system. #narcissisticabuse #narcissisticabuseawareness #scapegoat #scapegoats #abusivesystem #abusivesystems #narcissism #emotionalabuse #narcissisticabusesurvivors #narcissisticabusers #abusiveenvironment #patternsofabuse #patternofabuse #narcissisticsystems #narcissistabuse
It might come as a surprise for some. But knowing It might come as a surprise for some. But knowing the signs of a narcissist won’t help you to spot a narcissist. You might be thinking: what do you mean? I’ve spent ages learning about the hundreds of red flags, and I absolutely would be able to identify a narcissist. I say, hold up! Let me explain. When people finally escape narcissistic abuse and disconnect from the dynamic, they go through a natural induction period of learning about the subject. Narcissistic abuse is a rather complex subject that can take years of thorough research to understand. Those once lost in the fog finally have the knowledge and tools to understand what happened to them and how to prevent it moving forward. But here’s the catch—simply learning about narcissists will not stop you from involvement with one. It’s not just that narcissists present in numerous ways despite the core red flags. It’s more about where the survivor is on a subconscious level. Simply learning cognitive information about narcissists does not bypass the below-conscious mind, where the decisions about life and relationships happen. Rewiring the subconscious mind is a process that can take many years. Only through deep inner work can you truly spot a narcissist. To keep reading, checkout my latest blog, "How to Spot a Narcissist & Protect Yourself from Manipulation," where I explain the deeper inner aspects of how to spot a narcissist. #narcissisticabuse #narcissist #narcissists #redflags #narcissism #innerwork #spottingredflags #healingjourney #narcissistfree #narcissistfreenow #narcissistawareness #narcissistaware #freedomfromabuse
Triggers are the activation of our deepest wounds, Triggers are the activation of our deepest wounds, fears, and beliefs. – Beyond the Illusion
Narcissistic abuse can lead to profound rebirth an Narcissistic abuse can lead to profound rebirth and transformation. Swipe to explore how. Each step of conscious awareness along the way—going no contact with the narcissist, connecting with and trusting your intuition, identifying and healing core wounding, and changing your perception of self is putting you on the path toward alignment. Your soul evolves through all the times you feel the pain, connect with yourself, and face the dark night of the soul. As a result, new insights and inspirations find their way to you. Narcissistic abuse is a profoundly life-altering experience, capable of propelling you into self-discovery and opening new horizons. There is nothing more soul-crushing than going through such earth-shattering trauma, only to feel like you have no direction or purpose. Something inside changes when you go through narcissistic abuse, presenting a profound opportunity for rebirth and transformation. To find out more about aligning with your soul’s purpose, grab your free copy of “Healing Through Conscious Awareness” through the link in my bio. #narcissisticabuse #narcissisticabuserecovery #freedomfromabuse #recoveryfromabuse #posttraumaticgrowth #thedarknightofthesoul #narcissismfreedom #lifeafternarcissisticabuse #lifeafternarcissism
Recovering from narcissistic abuse is a profound a Recovering from narcissistic abuse is a profound and transformative process. It takes time, effort, and a commitment to connecting with and uncovering your true self. True healing requires turning inward. This stage involves introspection and connecting with your inner being — the part of you that holds wisdom and strength. In order to truly go deep within, one must commit to being by oneself for an extended period and not seek comfort and distraction by seeking a new relationship. Without that boundary, one cannot go deep within and connect with one’s inner being. Connecting with your inner self is about processing heavy emotions and rediscovering your true essence, which is who you are without the influence of abusers. The dark night is a challenging time but also the most expansive. Just when the caterpillar thought life was over, it became a butterfly.  In those darkest hours, it is not the universe cursing us. Instead, it is a period within our life to turn inward like never before and transmute the darkness into light. To keep reading, check out my latest blog post, “The 4 Key Stages of Healing After Narcissistic Abuse”, where I explore the pillars of recovery and how to reclaim your inner strength. #narcissisticabuse #narcissisticabuserecovery #recoveringfromnarcissisticabuse #darknightofthesoul #innerhealing #healingfromnarcissism #healingfromwithin #recoveryfromabuse #healingfromabuse
Self-awareness grows with each step toward recover Self-awareness grows with each step toward recovery. Trust the process. #narcissisticabuse #narcissisticabuserecovery #narcissisticabusehealing #traumahealing #cptsdhealing #healingafterabuse #traumarecovery #selfawareness #consciousawareness #soulrecovery
Narcissists aren't twin flames but karmic lessons Narcissists aren't twin flames but karmic lessons in self-worth. Though some describe narcissists as twin flames, nothing could be further from the truth. The twin flame concept has been distorted in new-age circles, leading many to mistake abuse for a twin flame connection and stay in toxic cycles. While the true meaning of a twin flame has been distorted, there’s still truth to it. A genuine twin flame is a mirror soul, reflecting the deepest parts of yourself. It's about mutual growth, understanding, and unconditional love. Narcissists instead are karmic relationships, not in the sense that anyone deserves the abuse. These relationships often carry a heavy karmic or lesson-oriented energy. They bring out intense challenges, mirroring unresolved wounds or personal patterns needing healing. These karmic relationships can feel compelling or even fated, but they often reveal harsh truths, prompting individuals to develop self-worth, boundaries, and emotional independence.  Through the experience, one often learns essential lessons, shedding light on unresolved issues and gaining clarity about healthy connections.  In this sense, the relationship itself can be a stepping stone toward more authentic and supportive relationships in the future. #narcissisticabuse #karmicrelationships #narcissisticrelationships #abusiverelationships #twinflames #narcissists #abuseisnotlove #toxiccycles #karmiclessons #selfworth #healthylove #healthyconnections
A red flag of narcissists often overlooked is thei A red flag of narcissists often overlooked is their relationships with others. When identifying whether someone is safe or abusive, it is wise to take notice of their relationships in the past and present. This can include relationships with exes, family, friends, and work colleagues. Pay attention to the dynamic between this person and these individuals. Listen carefully to how they describe and talk about them. Narcissists often have strained relationships, especially with exes and family. They might also have friends they’ve fallen out with, ghosted, or only contact when they need something. So, what steps can you take to investigate? 1. Listen closely to how they describe others. 2. Ask open-ended questions about relationships. 3. Let them talk and reveal themselves. 4. Notice if they show respect or not. While relationships can end for various reasons, a mature and respectful person will acknowledge it without needing to smear and overshare details. Narcissists will inevitably reveal too much about past relationships and smear their exes in one way or another. They do this because they lack boundaries and empathy and try to control others. Keep this red flag in mind when dating; it is crucial for spotting toxic and abusive individuals. #narcissism #knowthesigns #knowthesignsofanarc #narcissists #narcissismawareness #narcissisticabusers #narcissisticabuseawareness #redflags #redflagsofabuse #redflags101 #datingredflags
Each day is a new opportunity to reclaim your powe Each day is a new opportunity to reclaim your power and choose healing. 🌱
After completing the process of identifying and he After completing the process of identifying and healing core wounds, you can initiate a transformation in your self-perception. Rebuilding self-worth and self-identity lets you rewrite your story. This involves shifting your internal dialogue and reframing your narrative, fostering self-worth and a stronger sense of self-identity. This stage represents liberation from the perceptual constraints imposed by the abuse, enabling you to reclaim your sense of self. The best way to change your life is to change your perception of yourself. Narcissistic and other types of abusers reshape your self-perception, moulding you into an image that reflects their deficiencies and limitations. Rebuilding your self-worth and self-identity after narcissistic abuse allows you to rewrite your story. Like a caterpillar undergoing metamorphosis to become a beautiful butterfly, you emerge from the darkness with a renewed perception of yourself and your experiences. Understanding the underlying reasons for the events in your life is crucial for transforming your self-perception. Grab your free copy of “Healing Through Conscious Awareness” to learn how to shift your self-perception. Link in bio. #narcissisticabuse #narcissisticabuserecovery #narcissisticabusehealing #narcissisticrecovery #healingfromabuse #healingfromnarcissism #narcissisticabuser #narcissisticabusers #abuserecoverysupport
Healing the brain after narcissistic abuse is para Healing the brain after narcissistic abuse is paramount to your recovery. The trauma of narcissistic abuse often causes drastic changes to the brain, changing the way you think, feel, and function. Many survivors are unaware of these effects, which can lead to feelings of shame about their cognitive abilities and overall functioning. This is particularly true in the aftermath of narcissistic abuse. Healing the brain after narcissistic abuse can be a slow process, but it’s possible to reverse the damage caused by abuse. Healing the brain requires a holistic and multilayered approach. Narcissistic abuse impacts your ability to function due to the trauma it causes to the brain and nervous system. It changes specific brain regions by growing the amygdala, which is responsible for emotional processing, and shrinking the hippocampus, which is responsible for learning and memory. The nervous system gets stuck in the fight or flight response, and increased cortisol wreaks havoc on your body. Research indicates that many victims, including those with PHDs, struggle with cognitive tasks like reading and processing information after narcissistic abuse. Read my latest blog, “Healing the Brain After Narcissistic Abuse: 6 Essential Steps”, for a detailed guide on recovery after narcissistic abuse. #narcissisticabuse #narcissisticabuserecovery #traumarecovery #healingthebrain #abuserecovery #healingfromabuse #narcissisticabuseawareness #recoveryfromnarcissisticabuse #recoveryfromabuse
Lovely day at the wineries 🥂 good food, wine, d Lovely day at the wineries 🥂 good food, wine, driver, coffee and lots of laughs ☺️😌💖
Recovering one's soul after abuse is the utmost pr Recovering one's soul after abuse is the utmost priority. But what is soul recovery exactly? Soul recovery is about reclaiming your inner strength and rediscovering who you truly are. It's a process of recovering and reintegrating the fragmented parts of the soul lost during trauma, bringing them back together as one whole. The foundation of soul recovery is removing yourself from toxic and abusive situations, even when it is painful and distressing. It is the first step to disconnecting from Wetiko and reclaiming your soul. You cannot achieve soul recovery while with a narcissist. You can implement coping strategies, but it will only take you so far. Completely severing ties with abusive individuals and fleeing to safety is where true healing and soul recovery lie. Soul recovery is stepping out of the narcissist paradigm, where there is an obsessive focus on narcissists. You give away a part of your soul when you check the narcissist's social media, obsess over the new supply, worry about smear campaigns, and want the narcissist to experience karma. One of the reasons many people return to abusers is because of how challenging the recovery process is. The addiction to the narcissist and shattered sense of self makes people feel they can't live without the abuser, and they fall back into the tempting allure. Soul recovery means keeping one foot forward, no matter how challenging. That is essentially what the dark night of the soul is—you face the darkness to draw more light into your reality. For more insights like this, sign up for my free newsletter and begin your path to healing. Click the link in my bio to join my mailing list. #narcissisticabuse #narcissisticabuserecovery #soulrecovery #recoveryafterabuse #afterabuse #healingfromtrauma #healingfromnarcissisticabuse #narcissisticabusesurvivors #healingfromnarcissism #traumahealing
Identifying and healing core wounds is akin to the Identifying and healing core wounds is akin to the essential housework of narcissistic abuse recovery. Though often ignored, neglecting this crucial task leaves life in a mess. Without identifying and healing core wounds, one cannot begin the deep inner work that is necessary to break free from the chains of abuse. Identifying and healing core wounds will begin a massive shift in the healing process. It is the bridging of the unconscious mind with the conscious mind. Without this transition, people stay focused on the narcissist without ever looking at why the dynamic is occurring in the first place. This process marks the beginning of drawing the unconscious into the conscious mind. The unconscious reasons for being attached to this person make their way into your conscious awareness. Identifying and healing core wounds also begins to deactivate triggering. A trigger is a trauma that has risen to the surface. It is really what the whole narcissistic abuse experience is about—someone outside of us repeatedly triggering what hurts within. Narcissistic abuse is not logical - it is psychic and spiritual, targeting the most vulnerable parts within us. To discover what identifying and healing core wounds entails, download your free copy of my eBook. In it, I delve into this crucial topic and more. Click the link in my bio to get your copy, or DM me the word ‘ebook’ and I’ll send you the link directly. #narcissisticabuse #narcissistichealing #narcissisticabuserecovery #narcissismhealing #corewounds #healingcorewounds #freefromabuse #healingfromabuse #abusehealing #narcissismrecovery
True 🌻🌻🌻 True 🌻🌻🌻
Healing from narcissistic abuse involves moving th Healing from narcissistic abuse involves moving through the different stages of grief. The stages of grief include seven stages: 1. Shock 2. Denial 3. Anger 4. Bargaining 5. Depression 6. Testing 7. Acceptance These stages apply to narcissistic abuse recovery because this is what happens in the healing process. The first stage of grief is shock at what one has experienced. The initial shock stage can be intense and overwhelming. Next is the denial phase, which often includes breaking no contact. It can also include what is known as euphoric recall, where the brain tends to remember the good times and dismiss the bad times with the narcissist. After denial, a lot of anger can surface, and people deal with this anger in different ways. Following anger can be a phase of bargaining, which includes wondering about the what-ifs, seeking a sense of control, and experiencing guilt. Followed by this can be depression and helplessness. However, when one processes the heavy emotions, they can move into the testing and expansion stage. It can involve putting yourself out there again and trying new things. Lastly, acceptance follows as one processes the six stages of grief. Moving through them is a key sign you're healing from narcissistic abuse. Check out my blog post, “Signs You’re Healing from Narcissistic Abuse,” to learn more. Visit my website beyondtheillusion.co or click the link in my bio. #narcissismrecovery #narcissistrecovery #narcissisticabusehealing #healingfromnarcissisticabuse #healingfromabuseandtrauma #healingfromabuse #abusehealing #healingfromnarcissist #griefhealing #griefjourney
The advantages of tapping into and relying on intu The advantages of tapping into and relying on intuition are limitless. This pivotal stage in narcissistic abuse recovery opens the door to a more aligned life filled with beauty and expansiveness. It marked the initial breakthrough in my healing journey, propelling me toward profound inner wisdom and self-trust. Listening to your intuition is how you learn to set boundaries and resolve the mind-body disconnection caused by narcissistic abuse. Intuition becomes your guide for what you will and won’t accept from people and life. It helps you clear the space to remove toxic and abusive people from your life and listen to yourself for the first time. Intuition is an inner knowing expressed as a feeling or sensation in your body. It is always present but requires tuning in to recognise it. This God-given internal guidance system is always with us, but we may not even realise it exists. Intuition is more of an esoteric subject not taught in schools and universities, so when you go out into the world, you might not know what it is, let alone how to connect with it. It takes a leap of faith to begin following your intuition, and when you do, you realise that it has been there all along. Uncover how to connect with your intuition with my free eBook, “Healing Through Conscious Awareness.” Discover valuable insights and practical steps to deepen your connection with yourself. Tap the link in my bio to get your free copy! #narcissisticabuse #healingfromnarcissism #narcissisticabuserecovery #healingfromnarcissisticabuse #abuserecoverysupport #narcissismrecovery #afterabuse #lifeafternarcissisticabuse #healingafterabuse #intuition #followyourintuition #boundaries
Unlock the keys to healing with my free eBook, “ Unlock the keys to healing with my free eBook, “Healing Through Conscious Awareness.” This powerful resource covers vital topics like committing to no contact, trusting your intuition, identifying and healing core wounds, transforming your self-perception, establishing successful habits, and aligning with your soul’s true purpose. Discover essential strategies and insights designed to support your inner transformation and guide you through the recovery process from narcissistic abuse. Click the link in my bio to download your copy now! #narcissisticabuserecoverysupport #narcissisticabuserecovery #narcissisticabuse #narcissistabuse #cptsdsupport #cptsdrecoverytools #healingfromnarcissisticabuse #healingfromabuse #healfromabuse #abuserecoverysupport #abuserecovery
Narcissists ensnare people by preying on their vul Narcissists ensnare people by preying on their vulnerabilities, empathy, and lack of knowledge. They make you dependent on their validation to feel whole within yourself. As long as you feel weak within yourself, narcissists will always have the upper hand over you. Remember, narcissists are not all-powerful and knowing. They have to break you down and weaken you so that you believe they have authority over you.  It can be challenging to think through the fog of narcissistic abuse, with the continuous lies, gaslighting, threats, and fear of retaliation, but learning how to master our strength is our ultimate power.  By finding validation within and healing core wounds, you can completely disconnect from the narcissist paradigm. Inner strength, much like intuition, is a muscle that grows stronger with use. The more you choose your soul’s survival and cultivate self-awareness, the more your vulnerability will transform into internal strength. Amid spiritual warfare and psychological attacks, staying grounded can seem nearly impossible. However, these are the moments when we can discover the innate strength of the human spirit. We can reclaim our power from dark forces by becoming conscious and not feeding Wetiko the fear that it thrives off.  Follow on Instagram for inspiration and guidance on recovering from narcissistic abuse—gain self-awareness, inner strength, and soul healing. #narcissists #narcissisticabusesurvivors #narcissistsurvivors #healingfromnarcissist #healingfromabuse #narcissismfree #narcissistfree #narcissistfreenow #healingfromnarcissism #freefromabuse #innerstrength
Committing to no contact is the crucial first step Committing to no contact is the crucial first step toward conscious awareness. While it may seem straightforward, many survivors get stuck at this stage. It's one of those tasks that is easier said than done, yet it is essential for making a full recovery from narcissistic abuse. Healing is impossible if you remain in contact with a narcissist, as it keeps you physically, spiritually, and emotionally unwell. You can learn everything about narcissists and even attempt to heal, but if you keep breaking no contact, all your efforts are in vain. Failing to commit to no contact indicates an addiction. When you desire to let go but cannot, it signifies addiction. Addiction is tied to shame and fundamentally involves avoiding painful emotions. As long as you remain addicted to something that is destroying you, you will continue to evade those painful emotions. Wondering why going no contact is so challenging? discover the key reasons and explore essential recovery steps in my free eBook. It covers no contact and five other crucial strategies for overcoming narcissistic abuse. Click the link in my bio to get your copy! #narcissisticabuse #narcissistabuse #narcissisticabuserecovery #recoveryfromabuse #nocontact #abusiverelationships #abuserecoverysupport #nocontactwithnarcissists #nocontactwithsociopaths #traumabonding #narcissistfree
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